June 11, 2024

Assassins Anonymous

By Rob Hart
Review by
The story of a former hitman with a target on his back and a vow not to kill, Assassins Anonymous combines a fantastic narrator, global intrigue and dash of romance for a hilarious read.
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Packed with nonstop action, globe-trotting adventure and laugh-out-loud humor, Rob Hart’s Assassins Anonymous is an absolute blast.

We open as main character Mark is celebrating a year of sobriety in his 12-step program, but as he cleans up after the meeting, he’s violently attacked by a Russian man he’s never met. For Mark, AA stands for Assassins Anonymous, and he was celebrating a year without killing anyone—a vow he manages to keep even after his unknown assailant stabs him in the side.

In his life before AA, Mark was a government assassin known as Pale Horse, and built a reputation as a ruthless and skilled killer. A terrible mistake led him to quit the game and vow to never take another life again. That’s a lot easier said than done when someone is trying to kill him. Mark needs to figure out who wants him dead, and the list is not short. Complicating matters, he’s determined to accomplish this without sacrificing his sobriety: He can’t kill anyone, even the people determined to annihilate him. 

Hart takes readers on a wild ride across the globe as Mark searches for the person behind the assassination attempt, reliving his former exploits along the way. He partners up with potential love interest Astrid, a trauma surgeon for the criminal underworld, and his much beloved cat, P. Kitty, is also in tow. The supporting cast really makes this novel shine, from Astrid’s wry reactions to Mark’s fellow Assassins Anonymous members to the colorful group of criminals and spies from his dark past. 

Assassins Anonymous is hilarious and irreverent (e.g., a hitman bringing his cat along on his adventures) without ever falling into the trap of being ridiculous. With his dry sense of humor and self-deprecating nature, Mark is a fantastic narrator. Add to that some global intrigue and a dash of romance, and this novel is an immensely satisfying read.

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